That's where I am in this crazy cancer circus. I'm jumping through the hoops, juggling flaming torches, and walking the tightrope while trying not to concentrate on the smelly elephant breathing down my neck. Last Monday's day of tests verified that I must take more tests before we proceed with surgery.
I haven't been this out-of-control since I was a child, under the thumb of my parents. This is definitely out of my hands, and in God's. I trust there is a GOOD REASON why this is progressing so slowly. I wish I could flip to the end of the story and know how this saga ends.
Good news - I'll be able to see my daughter's "Grand March," a beautiful parade of all the dressed-up couples at the high school prom, which I probably would have missed otherwise. Also, I have another week to tie up some loose ends at work that were flying wildly in the wind, and stressing me out more than I need to be stressed.
Bad news - I hope I won't miss my oldest two kids' graduation from college in May. Dang it! I've worked hard for their degrees!
There is only one answer to every problem - prayer.
Dear Our Lady of Guadalupe,
REMEMBER, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help, or sought thy intercession was left unaided. Inspired with this confidence, I fly to thee, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother; to thee do I come; before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy mercy hear and answer me. Amen
Memorare - A Prayer to St. Mary